Aren’t there things you would like to be able just to pretend never happened? Unfortunately, pretending doesn’t make it so. Our past always impacts our future. The question is how.
Do you want to be a “virtuous leader” (here defined as a leader who is more focused on the greater good than on self-interest)? If so, you must learn to practice restorative forgiveness. I read the following definition of forgiveness yesterday, and it resonated deeply with me. Here it is. “Forgiveness is the capacity to foster collective abandonment of justified resentment, bitterness, and blame, and, instead, it is the adoption of positive, forward-looking approaches in response to harm or danger.”
It’s all about what we abandon and what we adopt. You can look forward to a positive future if you’re holding onto wrongs committed against you in the past. Likewise, it isn’t enough to just abandon the wrongs if you aren’t going to be intentional about moving on.
Non-Christians can choose to forgive, but no Christ-follower should ever decide to live with unforgiveness. After all, we have not only seen this beautiful commodity demonstrated amazingly in Jesus; we benefit from it every day! The Father forgives us freely because of Jesus. So, we can (must) forgive others because of Jesus. To do this, we must focus on the right things and abandon the wrong ones.
In the past…People sinned against me (And, of course, I sinned against others. We just choose to forget this, because the wrongs of others always seem bigger than the wrongs we commit).
or
In the past…the Father forgave me in Jesus.
Today…I choose to remember those hurtful things done to me.
or
Today…I am experiencing forgiveness, so I choose to abandon those hurtful things done to me.
In the future…I will never forget because they do not deserve forgiveness.
or
In the future…I will live free with a bounce in my step, a smile on my face and a twinkle in my eye because I no longer carry the burden of unforgiveness that used to weigh me down.
Oh, the joy of forgiveness!
“Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.” Colossians 3:12-14
Forgiveness – what a joyful gift!
You love me, Father God, as if
I never turned away.
You give what I can never earn,
A favor, Lord, I can’t return,
A debt I cannot pay.
Forgiveness – what a joyful sound!
I’ll share Your gift with all around,
For none of us can pay.
Forget what others owe to me!
I set us both completely free!
I wipe their wrong away!
Forgiveness – Father God, in You
The dreams of love are coming true.
Your peace will be restored,
For Mercy sees what we can be
And grows it to reality
In Jesus Christ our Lord.
Lead and live today in a way that demonstrates the fact that Jesus forgave you, and you are going to forgive others. It will set both you and them free!