Month: April 2019

I’m spending this week in Arusha, Tanzania. It’s been almost 20 years since I was here. The last time I was in Tanzania I was training church planters and missionaries from all over East Africa. One of the students in that training is now the head of the missions department for the Tanzanian Assemblies of God.

It’s amazing to watch people, in whose life you have invested, outgrow you in scope and impact. I doubt if Paul Balela even remembers me. That’s unimportant. But, I remember him. It was clear then that he had a special touch from God on his life.

I feel called to be a bridge. I love helping people move from their present to an uncertain future. Sometimes I get to cast that vision and lead the way. At other times, it’s clear that God has placed me in someone’s life to help provide needed resources so they might fulfill a pre-existing God-given vision.

I might lead some for years, but if I do things right, a day will come when the leader gets to turn into the follower. In these moments, leader ship may diminish, but influence thrives. This puts a smile on my face!

Do you think of yourself as a positive person? The better question might be, do the people around you consider you a positive person? I recently had a conversation with one of my sons in which he asked me if I thought I was an optimistic person. It was an interesting question as I’ve thought about this a lot over the past couple of years. The truth is, I didn’t like what I discovered about myself as I started the process. I’m not naturally prone toward positivity. It’s easier for me to see what’s broken than admire what’s working well. This trait helps me as I work on organizational systems, but systems are made up of people, and they need positive leaders. Correction–people deserve positive leaders. After all, people join organizations because of things like vision and compensation packages, but they leave organizations because of poor leaders. And, as you’ll read below, life and death really are in the tongue–especially as it relates to people with power. All leaders need to embrace this truth, but grasping this reality is essential for those of us who serve the Church, as so much is at stake. 

Here’s what I discovered and what I’m doing to “work on myself.” I used to be more naturally optimistic. I no longer am. I have come to realize that if I’m not careful, I will move toward the negative. I don’t like this about myself, but I can’t fix what I don’t acknowledge as broken. So, what brought about this change? What happened? Life happened. The truth is that we all face challenges. Good things happen to all of us, but so do bad things. The problem is that adverse events seem to have a more significant impact on our psyches than do positive.

Stanford University professor, Clifford Nass, argues that “some people do have a more positive outlook, but almost everyone remembers negative things more strongly and in more detail.” It turns out that we think more often and at a deeper level as we process negative emotions. Nass goes on to say that “we tend to ruminate more about unpleasant events — and use stronger words to describe them — than happy ones.”

Roy F. Baumeister, a professor of social psychology at Florida State University wrote, “bad emotions, bad parents and bad feedback have more impact than good ones. Bad impressions and bad stereotypes are quicker to form and more resistant to disconfirmation than good ones.” (https://assets.csom.umn.edu/assets/71516.pdf). Some of this is hardwired into our brains. After all, the “bad stuff” often brings danger into our lives. It seems God equipped our brains to pay special attention to these stimuli to keep us safe. Dr. Timothy J. Bono of Washington University in St. Louis argues that “dwelling on the ‘bad stuff’ is similar to the sensation of pain–it’s our bodies working to keep us safe.”

According to Rick Hansen, Ph.D., negative emotions stimulate the amygdala, which he refers to as “the alarm bell of your brain.” Here’s the science related to what’s happening in our brains when we face challenges. The amygdala uses twice as many neurons in its search for the bad news. Hansen states, “once it sounds the alarm, negative events and experiences get quickly stored in memory.” Dr. Randy Larsen asserts that “not only do negative events and experiences imprint more quickly, they also linger longer than positive ones. This stickiness is known as positive-negative asymmetry or the negativity bias.”

So, does this mean that negativity is predestined to win the battle for our minds? Not at all. It turns out that it’s just a numbers game. Baumeister reminds us that “many good events can overcome the psychological effects of a single bad one.” 

It seems that the Apostle Paul (the guy who wrote a lot of the New Testament) understood this when he told the believers living in Macedonia to think about positive things. Okay, those weren’t his exact words, but they’re close. Here’s what he actually said: 

“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” (Philippians 4:8, New International Version of the Holy Bible).

Paul, under the guidance of the Holy Spirit, told us to think about all of these good–AKA, “positive” things. However, it’s important for us to understand that “thinking about” something is more than simply thinking to ourselves, “Hey, that’s cool” and then moving on. Here are some other ways to translate the activity of “thinking.”

• “focus your thoughts on these things” (Common English Bible)
• “dwell on these things” (Holman Christian Standard Bible)
• “fill your mind with those things” (Good News Translation)
• “you’ll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things” (The Message Bible)
• “meditate on these things” (New King James Version)

All of these indicate that the process of thinking about something requires effort and time–part of what we need to overcome negative thought patterns. Part? Yes, we need time and quantity. And, that’s precisely what Paul gives us in this passage of scripture. We are to center our thinking (time) on a whole list of positive things (quantity). What I love about the list that we have here is that no matter how bad my day is going, I can find these things present in my life. It may just take a little bit more effort at times to find them.

So, here’s the big take away.

Intentional focus on positive happenings or ideas can change how you think.
Oh, and just in case you’re not a Bible person yet, think about these two simple things. First, this Bible passage (which is nearly 2,000 years old) gives us advice that backs up what psychologists are discovering today about the human brain and how it processes information. Second, Paul wrote this letter from a prison dungeon. He was putting into practice everything he was sharing, and it was working. Talk about authenticity! 
In case you like enumerated takeaways, here you go. 

1. Reject fatalism–” For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.” Ephesians 6:12

2. Acknowledge that positivity requires action–“Summing it all up, friends, I’d say you’ll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse. Put into practice what you learned from me, what you heard and saw and realized. Do that, and God, who makes everything work together, will work you into his most excellent harmonies.” Philippians 4:8.9 (The Message Bible)

3. Recognize that faith originates in the God who means good for you-“…he rewards those who earnestly seek him.” (Hebrews 11:6b)

4. Seek out positive people. After all, the company we keep influences how we think and act–“Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.” Proverbs 13:20

5. Limit your social media involvement–” Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.” Romans 12:2

6. Moderate the amount of “news” you consume. You’ve probably heard the old news adage, “If it bleeds, it leads.” Most days it seems like they ought to call it the Bad News. Multiply that times 24-hour news, and there is a lot out there to get us thinking negatively. I’m not recommending that you live with your head in the sand, but I am suggesting that you limit your intake. “For as he thinks in his heart, so is he.” Proverbs 23:7

7. Understand what’s at stake. The enemy wants to win the battle for your mind. “For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.” Ephesians 6:12

8. Don’t wear flip flops into battle. As the scripture above makes clear, this is war, but the Lord has made available to his children armor to keep us safe. ” Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. Stand therefore, having girded your waist with truth, having put on the breastplate of righteousness, and having shod your feet with the preparation of the gospel of peace; above all, taking the shield of faith with which you will be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked one. And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.” Ephesians 6:13-17

9. Pray! “Watch and pray that you may not enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.” Matthew 26:41

10. Be grateful. Thankfulness will change the way you think and feel (i.e., give you peace)–“Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.” Colossians 3:15

11. Don’t accept negative thoughts–“We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” 1 Corinthians 10:5

12. Remember that it’s all about Jesus–“Keep your eyes on Jesus, who both began and finished this race we’re in. Study how he did it. Because he never lost sight of where he was headed—that exhilarating finish in and with God—he could put up with anything along the way: Cross, shame, whatever. And now he’s there, in the place of honor, right alongside God. When you find yourselves flagging in your faith, go over that story again, item by item, that long litany of hostility he plowed through. That will shoot adrenaline into your souls!” (Hebrews 12:2-3)

I’m am learning every day that even though I’m not necessarily an optimist by disposition, I can be one through discipline. Why don’t you give it a try and let me know what happens?